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The Usual Reflections

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It’s New Year’s Eve and I’m supposed to reflect on the year gone by.  It’s obligatory.  Due to an unexpected, but wonderful visit from a friend, I am writing much later than I expected and after several glasses of wine and a couple cocktails.  Consider yourself warned.

On this day one year ago, I was absolutely depressed.  My New Year’s Eve started around 6 something in the morning.  I woke up, rolled over, switched on my computer, and hoped, as always, to find Geoff online.  At this time our relationship was officially friendly, but he was still the person I wanted to talk to most.  On this particular day, however, something changed.  For some reason, he decided to video call me and we talked face to face for the first time since he’d left Taiwan in October.  Seeing his face was not something I’d expected.  I wanted nothing more than to be close to him again, and it was all I could think about.  I even recall going online to see how much it would cost to get to Northern England in time for their New Year’s Eve.  As it turns out, it wasn’t outrageously expensive, just outrageously inconvenient.  I remember him messaging me after our video chat to tell me he’d forgotten how beautiful I was.  I always marked that day as a turning point in our relationship.   I don’t know what made him decide to click that button that would allow us to see each other’s faces, but things were different after that.

And one year later, I’m sitting next to him on our sofa in the apartment we share in Taiwan, wearing the ring he gave me just under a week ago.  There is only one thing missing from my life, and I hope to have that part of my heart restored very soon.  From the depths of despair, I am raised to the utter heights of love.  This is truly a new beginning.  I get to live my own life.  And it will be more exciting than ever before.